Category Archives: Bits and Pieces

Call of Duty – Modern Warfare 4

After recent events in Afghanistan, Infinity Ward have announced a new feature in their forthcoming game Call of Duty – Modern Warfare 4:

“After killing a member of the Taliban, press and hold the square button to whip your cock out and piss on his corpse.” said Brent McMchmuck – Game Designer.

IN GAME FOOTAGE PREVIEW

Tiziano Crudeli

Tiziano Crudeli is currently doing the rounds in the Ladbrokes adverts on tv; I am a huge fan of his because you simply can’t beat this man’s passion for football and his beloved AC Milan!!!

I would love to see him commentate on Sky Sports; even if it was just for one game!

What do we get instead? Alan “I love Arsenal and live in the past” Smith.  How care you compare!?

Tiziano, I salute you!  FANTASTICO

Lazy Saturday mornings with the mutt

I had every intention of making this weekend a quiet one after last weekends debauchery; last friday I had my Christmas Party (two bottles of red wine, whiskey and lager resulted in me being a bit fragile the next day. Tut), recovery on the Saturday (thanks to a 5 hour nap with the dog) and then I spent Sunday cleaning the house and putting up the Christmas decorations.

OK, so only Friday was debauched, but I still wanted to chill! Is that a crime!? I know I should be out sky diving and stuff like that along with everyone else my age, but this time of year is all about relaxation to me!

It’s now midday and I am still sat in my spacious and comfy armchair with my feet up on another chair, the duvet is wrapped around me and Chico traditionally placed himself onto my lap about 2 hours ago; neither of us have moved since.

Whatever half-arsed reluctant plans I had went right out of the window and it further proves my theory that:

Chico+lap = Not conducive to energetic Saturday morning starts!

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Toejam and Earl – Sega Megadrive

Toejam and Earl is an exceptional game on the Sega Megadrive and one that I played to death when I was 13 years old; my favourite thing about it was the game’s legendary soundtrack; Stone cold funk!  I still have my original game, and it’s in my top 10 games of all time.

The game is absolutely filled to the brim with wisecracks, one liners and slapstick comedy. If you’ve never played it, get down with the motherfucking shit!

Hindsight is a wonderful thing isn’t it? Looking back now, I can see why I love slap funk bass and groove as much as I do!  The soundtrack skips and slaps as you go along helping Toejam and Earl (two aliens from the planet Funkotron) in their quest to find pieces of their spaceship because they crash landed on Earth.  A very crazy cartoony Earth full of weird nasties like man-eating post boxes and ghostly ice cream vans!

The other cool thing about this game was the random game setting which really shook things up because the generic coloured power up presents changed randomly each time you played.  The presents either provided you with an arsenal of gadgets and weapons, or killed you off with various hilarious booby prizes!

I’m still hopeful that this will come to Xbox Live so that I can have a game or two with some mates and relive the good old days; in the meantime I guess I’ll just have to remain a pointdexter!

Jammin’

Yet another reason why Call of Duty isn’t the puppies privates and never will be

Angelos Epithemiou and Friends Dvd

Dan Renton Skinner is a comedy genius; I’ve just watched his ‘Angelos Epithemiou and Friends’ DVD and thought it was absolutely hilarious.

I’ve been a huge fan of Dan’s character ‘Angelos Epithemiou’ for a couple of years now; most of you will probably know him from ‘Shooting Stars’ and it’s great to see him logging the limelight on stage.  I think  Dan’s a very underated comedian and a breath of fresh air compared to the Waitrose loyalty card shopper’s favourite Michael ‘I’m posh and like to squeel posh people jokes like an educated piggy wiggy!’ McIntyre.

For those of you who haven’t seen Angelos before, have a quick mooch on youtube and savour the unique surreal, witty and obscure banter; he’s worth watching for his fantastic repetoir of facial expressions and inimitable awkwardness on stage.

If you’ve ever worked in a shop or other vocation where you deal with the general public; I’ll lay money on it that you’ve come across someone like Angelos Epithemiou and you are instantly reminded of them?!

I think that’s the true genius of the character Dan created!

Angelos Epithemiou on Soccer AM


 

Warhammer 40000 Space Marine – Xbox 360

Warhammer 40k was as much a part of my childhood as A-Team and Knightrider was; I got into Games workshop games way back in 1989 playing Blood Bowl with some friends in the library after school.

Blood Bowl eventually led to Warhammer 40k which quickly became my game of choice and I spent many hours painting figures, reading the magazine ‘White Dwarf’ (not a specialist porn mag!) and shaving down pieces of foam to make scenery for the board game battles that often ensued between various friends and I.   However, nobody could hold a candle to Angelo and his love of all things Games Workshop.

Angelo and I were always to be found in Games Workshop on a Thursday night during the early Nineties; Angelo’s Dad used to get dropped off in Croydon on a Thursday night (My Dad never gave me a lift anywhere!) to have a mooch around the shop and take the piss out of all the socially backward people in there; probably without realising the irony that |WE were every bit as socially backward as they were with our own love of turn based gaming and all the other crazy shit that we did during our school years.  Manga, learning every word to outrageous films such as Robocop and the Running Man, as kids do!

Angelo’s bag was probably the ‘Epic’ version of Warhammer with the battles on a much more….epic…..scale involving tanks, support airships and the legendary Titan hulks with their unbeatable harpoon missle arsenals that Angelo would often make his own rules up about.  Napoleon Takis!  Just kidding Ang, just kidding!

I loved Epic too, but Warhammer 40K (40000 as they like to call it these days!) was a much more personal and focused game because you had to control an army of individual marines and support vehicles to overwhelm your opponent rather than.  I honestly (and I mean honestly!) never lost a game down at the shop which I was very proud of that fact.

Just as I was proud to have a squad of Dark Angel Space Marines.  Everyone picked their Space Marine ‘Chapter’ of choice back then; most people picked Space Wolves or Blood Angels because they were the cool chapters with ‘champion’ figurines like Logar Grimnar.  Dark Angels were the pariahs of the Space Marine universe and part of me identified with that!

Angelo loved the Ultramarines, indiciative of the fact that he’d been into the whole thing since day one; luckily for him, the games developers chose to keep their focus on the Ultramines (as the film developers did in the animated Space Marine Film) because Games Workshop have been very odd in how they’ve kept the franchise going.  There isn’t even an ‘epic’ anymore, much to Angelo’s disgust!

Anyway, enough with nostalgia, I have often said it that Xbox Live is stagnant with people overdosing on Call of Duty Modern Warfare 3; so it was great to rip off the selophant wrapping on the 40k game and try out the team deathmatch mode and the ‘Exterminatus’ survival mode too.

The game is very well designed and the team deathmatch mode provided a solid representation of what I knew to be the 40K universe, so much so that part of me felt 11 years old again.  You can eventually chose from ‘Tactical’ ‘Devastator’ and ‘Assault’ classes which have their own strengths and weaknesses when facing off against other players; most of whom seemed to be of a ridiculously high rank and took full advantage of running around with Plasma Cannons whilst I had to get up close with the chainsword because my bolter was so inneffective.  Incentive to rank up!

The Maps are fantastic, the perk system is well done and the style of gaming suits the genre; but I can’t help but feel that the game is very under-valued and anonymous behind the unfairly hyped first person shooter games that  have stollen all the glory; whether this means that this is the last 40K game we’ll see for a while remains to be seen!

The Exterminatus game mode was good fun, Angelo and I faced off against hordes of Orks before he eventually died several times.  Can’t hide behind your tape measure and made up rules now can you old boy!?  hahaha! All joking aside, this is a fantastic game, go and buy it!

Brother Antikrish.

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Ravish Sitar Pedal – Electro Harmonix

The tech boys over at Electro Harmonix are gods, for they have produced the holy grail of guitar effect pedals; The Ravish Sitar Pedal.

I was lucky enough to cut my teeth on a few original Electro Harmonix pedals when Alex purchased a few back in the nineties, the Big Muff (fuzz), Polyphase (phaser) and Electric Mistress (flange) were used on a couple of our tracks, ‘The Otherside’ and ‘You Stink’ immediately spring to mind!

I stumbled upon the Ravish Sitar pedal by accident whilst searching the net for an idea that I had for a song; having watched the youtube promo video, I went out and bought myself one along with my own Big Muff whilst out in the States!

For those unfamiliar with the brand or for those of you who are are just starting out to experiement with your guitar sound; I’d really recommend Electro Harmonix pedals because they are the absolute puppies privates when it comes to guitar FX pedals.  They are without a doubt the best made products on the market and are highly customisable to get unique and brilliant variations in sound.

The Ravish Sitar pedal is incredible in what it delivers, you can tweak and set up your sound by Key, delay, modulation.  You can also fiddle with several knobs (technical term!) to adjust the sympathetic settings, lead and delay; all of which can give you very different results indeed!

I got mine out the box, played around with the settings for about 30 minutes with the guitar tuned to C Major and this is the result I got!  As you can see, anyone can sound like a shit Ravi Shankar now!  So go out and buy one immediately!  Antikrish commands it!

Trip to the States October 2011 – Video Summary

Here’s a video summary of our trip to the USA! For quick viewing 🙂

 

Sundance 1 – Beautiful river up in Sundance, Utah.

 

Sundance 2 – Peaceful rock pool in Sundance, Utah.

 

 

Sundance 3 – The Mountains before entry to Sundance, Utah.

 

Bridal Veil Falls – The incredibly beautiful waterfall in Utah.

 

McDonalds – Shaking hands with the Pope.
Where I was when I found out Colonel Gaddafi had been shot dead!

 

Vegas Skyline – Daytime.

 

Palazzo Hotel – Reception and main entrance.

 

Palazzo Hotel – Our Room.

 

Margaritaville.

 

Las Vegas Strip – 1.

 

Las Vegas Strip – 2.

 

Palazzo Hotel – Outside.

 

The Venetian Hotel.

 

Palazzo Hotel Casino – Kev’s Big Win!

 

Palazzo Hotel Casino – Lorraine’s Big Win!

 

Manhattan Beach – Sitting with Rainy, knackered.

 

Manhattan Beach – Pier complete with Silent Hill style fog.

 

Me in a hot tub, Manhattan Beach.

 

Rainy in the hot tub, Manhattan Beach.

 

Lorraine on Rodeo Drive.

 

Lorraine and the Hollywood Sign.

 

Burger King’s Texan Whopper.

Palazzo Casino – Antikrish versus the Machines – 20/10/2011

I promised my Dad 7 years ago that I’d go to Las Vegas and try my luck in the casino’s. SHOW ME THE MONEY!

I remember making a conscious decision to re-evaluated my betting reserve and eventually decided to spend no more than $200 (I originally budgeted for about $600).  As I explained in an earlier post, I didn’t feel ‘lucky’; so I reduced my betting budget accordingly and avoided the card and roulette tables completely.  I reasoned that I’d come back one day in the future and see how I felt then!  Not bad logic for a guy who had drunk an offensive amount of tequila eh?

My favourite slot machine was the ‘Wheel of Fortune’ themed slots, I won about $400-$500 dollars on 4 machines (they are usually grouped in 4’s).  I was pretty wasted from drinking the Margarita’s and not having eaten too much (wasn’t a huge fan of the buffet we went to); however, playing slot machines is pretty instinctive even when I’m inebriated due to the amount of time I spent in Selsey’s seaside arcades. So on I went.

I had a generous win of just over $300 dollars on the ‘Wheel of Fortune machine’ (see video below), the Old Man was definitely with me that night; it’s a shame I didn’t have a 5 at the end of the 3 and 4 (on the reels) as that would have won the house prize; approximately $350,000 dollars.

Lorraine had stopped gambling by that point (after a good flutter on the ‘Sex and the City’ machines) as I think she was watching her cash with view to more shopping and was a bit puzzled by how the machines worked.  So I gave her $20 of my winnings and went onto the ‘Monopoly’ themed machines for her; winning her $98.10 which paid for the pukka ‘Guess’ handbag she had seen at the outlet mall only earlier upon our arrival to Las Vegas.

My last run of luck was winning a couple of hundred dollars on the ‘Star Wars’ machine; I would love to have one in my house, it had some fantastic features and bonuses, plus video and sounds from the films. Artoo Deetoo was my bitch.

So I came away well ‘up’ on the night in terms of my winnings; I had also fulfilled my promise to dear Daddy who had seen me right with my luck.

Thank you Daddy!

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VIDEO 1 – The BIG win!

VIDEO 2 – Lorraine’s Win

VIDEO 3 – Star Wars win 1

VIDEO 4 – Star Wars win 2