Category Archives: Bits and Pieces

Pork Tenderloin

Pork tenderloin from Bank Holiday Monday’s BBQ.

This is my latest flamed grilled creation and I took a lot of inspiration from Mr Fred Marco (Kansas City BBQ supremo) with regards to the tenderloin.  Fred served one at his place with a beautiful tangerine glaze and I have to say I’ve been dying to give it a whirl since; although I fancied giving it a bit of an English twist and that’s precisely what i did.  I couldn’t get over how inexpensive this cut of meat was.  I shall definitely be buying it again because it’s amazing value for money (considering you’re lucky if you can get a poxy pair of chops for that price now; this is quite literally all meat).

Basically I purchased a Pork Tenderloin from Sainsbury’s (£3.99 I kid you not!) and washed it down as I always do with a little water, then put two caps of olive oil into a pyrex dish and rolled the tenderloin around to get a nice even coating of oil on it.  Afterwards I took some of the sage and onion from the stuffing mix (I didn’t have any fresh her to use but don’t worry, that’s next) and rubbed that all over the surface.  Lastly, I just rubbed a little rock salt over the meat along with some fresh cracked black pepper, skewered the mother and away we go!!!!.

I wasn’t sure how the meat was going to cook, so I decided to whack it on the grill itself, just turning regularly.  It soon started to brown off and the fat dripping down created some lovely searing flames to seal it.   I eventually cut some slits into the meat itself to get a little even heat into the whole thing, I was worried by doing so that it’d dry the meat out but I was pleasantly surprised.  Inside everything was really cooked through well and I hadn’t gotten that really horrible dry pork texture.  Eurrgh.

I honestly haven’t a scooby (Scooby Doo = clue) how long I had it on the grill for, purely as I dangling on various meats, but when you get the following texture and no pink on the inside (not good) then it’s ready to go.  As you can see in the pic I eventually used the skewers to almost spit finish it at the back so that I had extra space on the grill as wel.  I could not believe how tender and succulent this meat was, even with the slightly crispy outside.  I just want to cook another one, it was a lot of fun to throw on I have to say!

GALLERY – Click for a larger image

BBQ – Take two

I’m about to go and BBQ in a bit.  This afternoon I will be serving:

  • Tandoori style chicken (with all my ingredients this time).
  • Panceta and parmesan filled pork sausages
  • Prime piece of sirloin steak
  • Pork tenderloin (which I’ve brushed with olive oil and rubbed sage, onion, black pepper and a little salt over). 
  • Pilau rice, coleslaw and all the usual side nibbles.

Might post pictures later if I don’t burn it all!

 

The beauty of ASCII art…if WordPress didn’t kcuf it up ^_^

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If you are desparate for some 80’s ASCII art thrills, then click here.

edit: Gawd Blimey…it looks like WordPress have sorted out the problem…now everyone can drool over the naked ASCII lady…WOOOHOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ASCII TITS!!!!!!

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                 ==:l   l   Snowman<-

Mad dogs and Anglo-Indians out in the midday gloom

Last night on the way home from work I popped into Sainsburys to buy some groceries.  Having walked down the aisle I noticed that the BBQ charcoal was on offer and thought it’d be a good idea to throw some chicken on the grill today.  I love to make up my own tandoori chicken style marinade and grabbed the very basic ingredients (minus butter as I wanted it to be low fat) along with some peppers and veg to grill.

Normally my tandoori marinade consists of:

  • 1 pot of low fat greek (or normal) yoghurt
  • 2-3 tablespoons of garlic and ginger paste
  • 1 tablespoon of fresh ground chillis
  • 1/4 cup of melted butter (or ghee)
  • 2-3 tablespoons of tandoori powder
  • 1 tablespoon of garam masala
  • 1 tablespoon of olive oil
  • A little pepper
  • The juice from 3-4 lemons
  • A splash of tap water to the mix to make things a little more watery than creamy to soak the chicken thoroughly.

So as you can see below, this is the kind of mixture I go for.  There is a definate ‘gloop’ factor to the mix and if you finger off the sauce you’ll see that the chicken is well soaked.  Dip it back in after though because you want a bit of sauce when grilling.  I tend to use much bigger fillets of chicken normally, and cut gill slits into it before marinading so that it really soaks in.

The weather today was really, really grim.  A far cry from yesterday apparently when it was beautiful and I was in the office.  Still, I won’t be beaten by the British weather.  I sat by my window and after the first downpour I noticed the clouds were moving fast so I ran down, threw on the bag of self-lighting charcoal (you need to use a match so that’s a lie!) and off we go!

So here we are, the coals are hot and the food is cooking.  This is my slightly pensive face as I can see the skies are beginning to change again with rain clouds (very heavy) starting to build up.  April has always been called ‘April showers’ in the UK, and last year it was our warmest month (practically summer) so it was perhaps an irony that the British weather decided to go back to normal today when I wanted my food.

This is the very teasing and tempting view I had when cooking.  It taunted me the whole time and I decided to share it with you all.  See how the big piece on the left calls to you and says “EAT ME!!!!”?  I only got a small bag of charcoal so it took slightly longer than normal too.  All the while the precipitation gradually increased almost in time with the chicken.  In the distance, I could hear thunder.  Yay!

The chicken had literally about 2 mins left to cook and the rain started coming down, very gently at first but enough to make me get out the brolly.  The cooking finished and I ran into the house rather smug that I had beaten the British weather system once more.  As you can see I decided to wear my lucky clover t-shirt that I picked up in America during St Patricks day.  Worth every penny, to be sure to be sure!

Et voila!!!  Chicken a la Antikrish (slightly more cooked than I would have liked but had to run and get a brolly!) with chargrilled veg and low fat tortillas from Sainsburys.  Alex will be the first to tell you that you can make it a lot more authentic and from scratch, but if you wake up at 9am, think “hmmm I want some funky chicken” then all you do is throw that lot in a bowl and let the chicken marinade in it for a minimum of two hours.  And whilst I’d definately say the authentic tastes way better (Al’x mushroom curry is to die for) this still isn’t too bad.

Pukka!

GALLERY – Click below for larger images

Biscuits ‘n Gravy!

Thought it was about time I put some pictures on here from my recent trip to the States, I started eating healthily today AND I needed to put a new category on here for food and cuisine (Alex is quite the chef); So it occurred to me that I should celebrate quite possibly my favourite American dish by putting a quick thread on it, thus giving a nostalgic nod to the delicious dishes that have made me go a bit stocky of late.

My favourite American dish has got to be biscuits and gravy, it’s a breakfast effort which s far more appetising than it looks (at least to the average person, the very sight makes my mouth water!).  It’s a fairly rustic and honest dish, it’s pretty much the equivalent of the full English that my Dad would often knock up on a Sunday or drag me down the cafe before going to see a game of footy.  Speaking of which, I made it for my Dad once and it was one of the few dishes he really liked; always a critic father’s aren’t they?

The biscuits aren’t really biscuits (all you non-Americans out there stop pulling faces), they are in fact very flakey tasty butter rolls that you use to tear off and eat the sausage gravy with.

I do make it for myself, especially now that I get supplies sent in the mail, but there’s really nothing quite like going out to a store, getting the stuff and sitting salivating whilst Amy breaks out the grub.  And what fantastic grub it is!

How to make biscuits and gravy:

First off, get a decent make of sausagemeat, my preferred brand is Jimmy Dean, the ‘hot’ is nice as it’s slightly warming with the peppers in it, the extra hot is amazing!  At home we’re spoiled for choice (especially if like me you have access to a Farmers market once a fortnight) and I have used Cumberland sausage which goes nicely!

Next up you need to get some biscuits, now you can either make them from scratch (Amy can, I’ve never had the patience to wait), buy a tube of ready-to-go Pillsbury Doughboy Biscuit Dough from a grocery store or you can get a Bisquick mix and make that up (what I usually do). For the sake of prosperity (and the sake of my stomach) we grabbed some ready made throw-in-the-oven dough (Pillsbury). Stick the oven on, stick the dough on a tray and oh Mamma!

Get the sausagemeat, put it all in a hot pan (no oil, there’s enough in the sausage fat!) and break it up into pea sized amounts using a wooden spoon, stir it round until cooked through and then reduce the heat.  I’m going to start adding chilli peppers to mine when I make it again!  that obviously might be quite some time yet thought.  Here’s hoping they invent very cheap liposuction on the NHS.  Oh wait, they have?!

Check on the biscuits as they’re made with butter and are likely to burn if you don’t! Nothing worse than burnt biscuits (fnar fnar) which can be used as a frisby or a North Korean conscripts helmet.  Although obviously if they got shot in the head wearing one then it’s not going to save their life.  That’d be stupid.  Well, it might with a pellet gun?

With the sausage cooking slowly and the biscuits doing their thing it’s time to get the gravy ready. Again, I love Jimmy Dean country gravy mix, Amy adds a little ranch seasoning into it to give it a little flavour. Again she can make it from scratch but I’m impatient and you don’t want to mess with the Anti-Hulk when he’s hungry trust me. With the Jimmy Dean you add milk to the mixture and stir until you get a nice thick consistency (use more milk if you like it creamy, hyuk hyuk).

Right, time to get shakin’. Get the sausage and stick it in the gravy, mix it up good momma. Mix it up good, oh yeah!  This is my favourite part, when you mix up the sausage I get something of an obscure satisfaction watching it all come together. “Here come old flattop, he come grooving up slowly, he got biscuits n gravy, he got festered up arteries”.

So, get the rolls out, stick em on a plate, traditionally you either pour the mix over the biscuits or you can have them on the side. I prefer the latter. And that’s it. A taste of Midwestern goodness!

“GALLERY – Click an image for a larger size.

Antikrish – ACE Clan sharpshooter extraordinaire!

Yaaay!  It’s my day off, having worked flat out 6:40am – 4:40pm Saturday and Sunday (overtime) I decided to take today as a days holiday and it’s effectively going to be my weekend!  I woke up at 8am, sauntered down to Sainsbury’s at 9am and grabbed my food to begin my diet; yes folks, I’m as big as a house at the moment and it’s time to get back to being a svelte demi-god. 

So apart from an imminent fiddle with the Danelectro (in practice for Wednesday) the rest of my day is going to be spent playing the xbox 360 with a few online buddies.  I have just started playing again after a slight break (xmas time roughly due to a kaput xbox), I spent Saturday night online with a few members playing with my Clan, no not the Ku Klux Klan but the ACE clan.  Big shout to Dilligaf, Kaka, Peds, Spanner and Ductapekiller.  No we don’t wear white sheets and I didn’t make them up either!

Since buying my xbox a few years ago my favourite online game was Rainbow Six : Vegas (right up up until Call of Duty 4 came out at the end of 2007).  Vegas was very much a thinking mans first person shooter (FPS) and I enjoyed sodding about with the ACE clan, having a few drinks and throwing C-4 around on a Friday night whilst exchanging tons of banter over our headsets.  Call of Duty 4 is a different kettle of fish to Vegas, it’s awesome to the extreme.  You can call in airstrikes, have chopper support if you have a string of kills without dying, fantastic stuff.  Nothing funnier than ruining a few cocky American kids and having them go off crying to mommy when I’ve shot them through the eyeball with a sniper rifle.  ‘KERPOW!’ “My bad!” (that was a joke, see previous Anti-rant entitled ‘My bad’).

So, I have decided to post a few threads about gaming, it’s something I’ve had a passion for since before I even started school; having a brother 7 years older than you with an Atari and a BBC Acorn Electron can do that to a guy, and I spent most of my youth in and out of gaming arcades.  Subsequently I’m something of a hardcore gamer (yes, even at 30 years old), Xbox 360, PS3, Wii, PSP and PC mainly, but I still like to play my Megadrive and Snes (more often than not on the PSP, emulation is a godsend thanks Al!!!)

More to follow today once I’ve tried out the new online multiplayer maps on COD4, and also sunk my teeth into Vegas 2 a bit more.  Decisions decisions!!!

Spice Cafe & Ken Livingston

Hyeeeeeeeeeeeeeyeeeee!  Hey rat fans!

I plan on getting back to my healthier eating this coming Monday, so, in order to bid farewell to my more debauched culinary habits I thought I’d have lunch down the Indian buffet today as something of a fatboys swansong.  Go out with a Bang(la) so to speak.

The restaurant in question is located about halfway down Surrey Street Market in Croydon, Surrey (UK), Alex first dragged me there in my teens one lunchtime from Boots and I’ve kept up the tradition by going down there on and off over the years (I have survived many changes in ownership).  In fact, I was unaware it had reopened as it’s been closed for a year and just came under new ownership; I only found out when Alan had popped down there last week.

Spice Express (commonly known as Spice Cafe amongst a few of my Indian friends at work) is very funky, £4.99 all you can eat, I’d heartily recommend this latest incarnation (especially the lamb curry, sadly wasn’t particularly hot but the quality of meat and flavour was great).  Very, very clean, fantastic staff, practically open kitchen, perfect.

When the 6 of us entered (My Guv’nor Alan, Doug, Dan, Leonie and Sam) we were greeted by a rather bizarre sight……….current Mayor of London Ken Livingston was schmoozing it up with Croydon counsellors for a PR stunt!.

It was absolutely packed, not by consumers, but his trendy lefty politically correct ‘HR ticksheet’ entourage (Or ethnic bingo as I like to call it…..”Have we got a Chinese woman?  Right, tick her off, Black man?  Tick him off, Big tall white guy standing at the back looking at the curry dishes wearing glasses, no, no, not ethnic enough, he’s clearly about as Indian as I am” !!!guffaw guffaw!!!) were all extremely animated and looked to vie for a photo opportunity themselves with Dobby the House Elf, right in front of the bloody buffet!!!.  We tried to manoeuver past them but it was tight let me tell you, the brown-nosers just wouldn’t move!

I think they must have heard my stomach growl as they shifted to reveal the hotplates of destiny; and it was well worth the wait.  Still, no sooner had Ken left the establishment the heavens opened up and I suspect he got rather drenched considering it was hail/heavy rain.  Karma is a lady and she sleeps in my bed 🙂

General point of advice to anyone, don’t get in my way when I’m hungry; I’m a divine agent of curry and I’ll stab you up with my poppadom of deceit!

P.s.  I’d vote for Boris Johnson, sorry Ken.

Corn Dogs

Well, that was quick.  I’m officially back home in the UK.  Bugger.

 You know when you literally just start relaxing and finding an inner peace, and it’s time to get back on the plane, hear all the kids screaming through boredom or some old git just coughing?  Well, the latter was me this time around, I’m shrugging off a fairly annoying chest infection that I acquired in Kansas; even virii (posh plural word for virus) are bigger and better in the States you know.  I was very fortunate to have Amy’s family clan caring for me whilst I was running a very slight fever.  Muchos respect.

Staying with the pretend Mexicana theme I’d like to voice how much I enjoyed the film ‘Nacho Libre’, that is to say I thought it was exceptionally funny.  I love Jack Black films, but the subtle way he brings Nacho to life is so much more FUNNY than anything I’ve seen him in yet.  I watched the film 3 times in the space of a week.  Sad some may say, others may simply say “bumblebee tuna” but it’s definately my bag and it was VERY funky that I got to see it.  One viewing in particular with ‘Cherry Garcia – Ben and Jerry’s ice cream’ which was perfecto. 

To say I feel rather jetlagged would be an understatement.  I am not sure if it’s because I’m old, portly from my trip, or run down due to my cold (most likely a combination of all three) but suffice to say that the trip back wasn’t fab.  Oh, aside from playing ‘Final Fantasy 7 Crisis Core’ on the PSP all the way home.  I remember how Alex and I totally obsessed over the original game when it came out on the first playstation, the final boss with Sepiroth took Alex hours and we mused at the time how Sepiroth rhymed with ‘nasty cough’ so I guess that’s why that has a slight amount of added relevance here!?!  For what it’s worth, the game is astoundingly good. 

Anyway, I got in around 5:30am this morning, grabbed the train to East Croydon (I like to get out quickly) and luckily found a Taxi who did VISA chip and pin because THE BLOODY BANKS WERE SCREWED IN GATWICK AND CROYDON, I COULD HAVE BEEN HIGH AND DRY YOU BUNCH OF SLAGS!  Good old cheeky cockney, “that’ll be a tenner please guv, pass us ya card” was words to my ears this morning I tell thee.

I got home, had a bath, unpacked, gave out gifts, Lorraine (sis) made me a bacon sandwich and I woke up around 5pm not knowing where in the hell I am, or when.  I listened to the Man Utd vs Villa game on the radio which was cool, although I do confess that I’m having some serious flashback issues.  In fact, my day has been like a really shitty episode of ‘LOST’.  But I’m now wrapped up in the duvet and all is well, ‘Match of the Day’ is on in a bit and I’m going to indulge back in a bit of English culture before I head back off into Final Fantasy land before some sleep.

I do have some rather funky and obscure pics to stick up over the next couple of days.  I imagine I’ll be somewhat more prompt than the promised posts of my trip which never transpired, largely due to the fact that I was enjoying myself so much I forgot.  Can you imagine that?!

Anyway, I’d like to take this opportunity to thank Amy, Genae, Brett, Ash and Ben for being extremely gracious hosts, and also for making me very welcome.  Have a stateside piece of chicken tikka for me!

Oh yes, and I want to do some music!!!!  OI BALDIE, GET YOUR STICKS OUT!!!!

Wednesday – The week so far

Well, it’s Wednesday morning and I’m already feeling more relaxed than I can remember for a very long time.  Coming back here felt like I’d been in a coma for the last 8-9 years and just came around, new buildings and developments had popped up, but for the most part it was just the same as I’d remembered.

Amy was kind enough to make me biscuits and gravy on my first morning here which was phenomenally good (my favourite rustic breakfast, sausage meat in a creamy gravy served with soft flakey butter rolls called biscuits).  For me such dishes are reflective of the sort of traditions I’m used to back home where my Dad always took me down the cafes (Caffffff) in and around London. 

I’ve spent most of the time since I’ve been here catching up with Amy’s family and trying to get it into my head that her sibblings are all grown up now and watching films I was too uptight to watch a few years ago because I was a miserable bastard (Elf, School of Rock, Radio) and generally kicking back.

The sunshine has broken through today finally, it’s much brighter out and with leaves still on trees and lots on the ground you’d be mistaken for thinking it was Autumn (fall). 

I’ve already found myself a nice new wardrobe of clothes, it’s very refreshing being able to walk into a store and find what I want fairly quickly.  Although that is a sign which tells me I need to get back on the old sushi diet again!

Saying that I went to an Indian buffet for lunch yesterday which was pretty good.  It really made me laugh walking in off the street into what looked from the outside just like any other fairly generic looking store.  Once inside I could smell the spices, the music was playing and when I sat down onto the almost generic ‘curry house’ furnishings I couldn’t help but feel a wry smile breaking out on my face.  I’d found a home away from home inside the home away from home (phew) and the Indians were beginning to take over America.  Ha ha ha!  All new improved Indians.  ‘Well, get off your horse and drink ya mango lassi!”.

My dad would have been so amused with the settin, Alex I’m sure would have found it extremely funny also and I just sat there happily munching away on some biriyani with a fairly good sag effort and pondered how bloody awful Indian food was when we found the only curry house in America last time I came to Olathe.  I think it’s going to be very popular over here very soon indeed!

Around 6pm yesterday evening a wonderful thing happened.  I HAD MY FIRST STEAK!!  WOOHOO!!  Amy, her sister Ashley and I went to Ruby Tuesdays, which for people back home is ‘slightly’ similar to Frankie and Benny’s, but bigger and better, obviously 🙂  Oh boy the steak was so good, eating something wholesome like that makes me feel centered in ways I can only imagine tibetan monks can atain after decades of meditation, and throwing eggs at Chinese soldiers. 

I also got very humbled by a very friendly young kid who asked me where my accent was from when he brought me my steak.  I used to get extremely embarassed when I was younger and never knew how to handle such things because I tended to be terminally shy (yes, really!) but last night it truly made me smile. 

I accepted the gesture as a wonderful compliment and was only too happy to talk to him.  He said he wanted to travel over to my neck of the woods and I only hope when he does he receives the same courtesy that I get here.  Doubtful but one can be hopeful.  It’s a textbook example of the friendly spirit I think you only really get out here in the Midwest of America, people are genuine, eternally curious and assertive with it. 

Oh, and the icing on the cake is that Amy’s moms (Genae) guitar is still in decent working order.  It looses tuning slightly but for the most part it’s like being reunited with an old friend.  Me and the guitar go way back let me tell ya, yessireee!  So I’ll be plink plink plinking away and trying to write something to commemorate my time back here.

So that’s it pretty much, half a week in and papa already has a brand new bag, wardrobe, full stomach and great company to spend the next week and a half with.  What more could a guy want?  I already know that I am going to regret leaving.  I always do.  Still, them’s the breaks?!!

Right, better go.  Have a fab bank holiday weekend back home guys and remember, STICK IT TO THE MAN!

Have you packed yet?!

I’m feeling very cool about going away tomorrow, I’ve had several texts this morning wishing me a safe trip, and an e mail from old baldie bonce which I was rather chuffed at.  I salute you Alexander old chap, tally ho and pip pip!. 

Anyway, “have you packed yet” has got to be one of those quintissentially English things people always ask when they know you are going on holiday; don’t you agree?!  It always makes me laugh because everyone does it, it’s one of the few classless traditions I can think of. 

So, just in case anyone is wondering my honest answer is no, I haven’t.  In fact, I’m going to thank the next  person who asks me for their concern and offer them a personal invitation to come and help me throw in my boxers!  “No, no, the black ones with hearts on them!”.

I normally pack the night before, this time around I’m even less concerned with my lack of packing because my plan is to pack up all my old clothes, suits and things, dump those in a case and when I get Stateside  and then on arrival, give them to charity.  It gets rid of my unwanted clothes in an ethical way AND the weight of my outward bound luggage matches that of my return flight; my cases will be stacked to the hilt with garments and things. 

Huzzah!  Who’s the daddy!?

p.s. Please don’t be shy to leave comments viewers!