Category Archives: Travelling

Utah

It’s been almost 3 weeks since I got back from my most recent visit to the States; those dang locals would probably say that I’ve taken my “sweet time”‘ in writing this particular entry; and they’d probably be right!

My visit to Utah took place between the 14th-21st of June 2011; I already miss the beautiful sight of waking up to the mountains, long grassy hills and watching the crystaline lakes go by as we travelled up and down the highways from place to place.

It’s a very odd thing, hearing the sound of singing birds as you walk out of an airport terminal; but that was my first impression of Utah, and in reflection I think it is a very appropriate one too given the amount of wildlife that I saw during my time in the Salt Lake City area and surrounding cities like Provo and Saratoga Springs. Deer, Skunk, a multitude of different birds and the occasional mink farm which stank like an old people’s retirement home.

Provo – Utah

Saratoga Springs – Utah

Saratoga Springs – Utah

Out of all the States I’ve visited, it’s definitely the most chilled out and relaxed, and it has the scenic Walmart I’ve ever seen!

Japanese prank show clips

The first clip below is about a poor unsuspecting chap who gets in the back of a taxi, the driver is actually a stunt driver and takes him on the ride of his life. I quite nearly wet myself laughing at the passengers reaction.

The second clip is actually a series of various pranks, my personal favourite has got to be the exploding cigarette guy around 0:59 seconds. My brother and I used to regularly booby trap my mothers ciggies and watch in delight as they used to blow out in cartoon-scale hilarity.

Japanese Gameshows

I have had an obsession with Japanese game shows right from when I first saw Japanese Endurance clips on Clive James’s telelvision programme during the eighties. My Dad and I would quite literally be in tears laughing at the participants trying to endure the most crazy tasks; a personal favourite was a guy who had to go through a tunnel and have live eels and other sea-creatures dropped on him. The chap in question gave the obligatory salute and yell, dive into the tunnel, only to then suddenly come shooting out seconds later with an octopus wrapped around his arm (it was clearly biting him).

The very old gameshow ‘Takeshi’s Castle’ also provided Dad and I with a lot of laughs thanks to re-runs on Challenge TV. It’s a shame that we only get mainstream 80’s game shows rather than the modern mayhem I saw during my visit. Kid’s doing a morning aerobics workout with a power ranger was one in particularly that genuinely twisted my melon the first day I was in Tokyo.

I finally made it to Japan just over 3 years ago now and my most vivid memory is of me sitting bleary eyed in my hotel room watching various shows whilst extremely jetlagged only to be confronted by the most incredible sunrises. I think the beauty of Japanese telelvision is that you can pretty much figure out what’s going on without speaking the language, and it genuinely doesn’t matter how obscure or surreal the game itself actually is.

The clip below features a game where an extremely brave guy has to submerge his body in Onsen (Japanese hot public baths/springs) grade waters (temperatures around 50oC/120oF) in order to score points. The point keeper is a scantily clad Japanese girl who has to bounce up and down on the point scoring button in her bikini. In reflection I always found these game shows funny because of my black sense of humour (laughing at the discomfort of others is still a bit of a vice of mine), but I’ve come to very much appreciate the game shows epitomisation of the Japanese people’s tendancy to ‘Get up and have a go’; something I have a profound respect for. Still, this is bloody funny?

Corn Dogs

Well, that was quick.  I’m officially back home in the UK.  Bugger.

 You know when you literally just start relaxing and finding an inner peace, and it’s time to get back on the plane, hear all the kids screaming through boredom or some old git just coughing?  Well, the latter was me this time around, I’m shrugging off a fairly annoying chest infection that I acquired in Kansas; even virii (posh plural word for virus) are bigger and better in the States you know.  I was very fortunate to have Amy’s family clan caring for me whilst I was running a very slight fever.  Muchos respect.

Staying with the pretend Mexicana theme I’d like to voice how much I enjoyed the film ‘Nacho Libre’, that is to say I thought it was exceptionally funny.  I love Jack Black films, but the subtle way he brings Nacho to life is so much more FUNNY than anything I’ve seen him in yet.  I watched the film 3 times in the space of a week.  Sad some may say, others may simply say “bumblebee tuna” but it’s definately my bag and it was VERY funky that I got to see it.  One viewing in particular with ‘Cherry Garcia – Ben and Jerry’s ice cream’ which was perfecto. 

To say I feel rather jetlagged would be an understatement.  I am not sure if it’s because I’m old, portly from my trip, or run down due to my cold (most likely a combination of all three) but suffice to say that the trip back wasn’t fab.  Oh, aside from playing ‘Final Fantasy 7 Crisis Core’ on the PSP all the way home.  I remember how Alex and I totally obsessed over the original game when it came out on the first playstation, the final boss with Sepiroth took Alex hours and we mused at the time how Sepiroth rhymed with ‘nasty cough’ so I guess that’s why that has a slight amount of added relevance here!?!  For what it’s worth, the game is astoundingly good. 

Anyway, I got in around 5:30am this morning, grabbed the train to East Croydon (I like to get out quickly) and luckily found a Taxi who did VISA chip and pin because THE BLOODY BANKS WERE SCREWED IN GATWICK AND CROYDON, I COULD HAVE BEEN HIGH AND DRY YOU BUNCH OF SLAGS!  Good old cheeky cockney, “that’ll be a tenner please guv, pass us ya card” was words to my ears this morning I tell thee.

I got home, had a bath, unpacked, gave out gifts, Lorraine (sis) made me a bacon sandwich and I woke up around 5pm not knowing where in the hell I am, or when.  I listened to the Man Utd vs Villa game on the radio which was cool, although I do confess that I’m having some serious flashback issues.  In fact, my day has been like a really shitty episode of ‘LOST’.  But I’m now wrapped up in the duvet and all is well, ‘Match of the Day’ is on in a bit and I’m going to indulge back in a bit of English culture before I head back off into Final Fantasy land before some sleep.

I do have some rather funky and obscure pics to stick up over the next couple of days.  I imagine I’ll be somewhat more prompt than the promised posts of my trip which never transpired, largely due to the fact that I was enjoying myself so much I forgot.  Can you imagine that?!

Anyway, I’d like to take this opportunity to thank Amy, Genae, Brett, Ash and Ben for being extremely gracious hosts, and also for making me very welcome.  Have a stateside piece of chicken tikka for me!

Oh yes, and I want to do some music!!!!  OI BALDIE, GET YOUR STICKS OUT!!!!

Wednesday – The week so far

Well, it’s Wednesday morning and I’m already feeling more relaxed than I can remember for a very long time.  Coming back here felt like I’d been in a coma for the last 8-9 years and just came around, new buildings and developments had popped up, but for the most part it was just the same as I’d remembered.

Amy was kind enough to make me biscuits and gravy on my first morning here which was phenomenally good (my favourite rustic breakfast, sausage meat in a creamy gravy served with soft flakey butter rolls called biscuits).  For me such dishes are reflective of the sort of traditions I’m used to back home where my Dad always took me down the cafes (Caffffff) in and around London. 

I’ve spent most of the time since I’ve been here catching up with Amy’s family and trying to get it into my head that her sibblings are all grown up now and watching films I was too uptight to watch a few years ago because I was a miserable bastard (Elf, School of Rock, Radio) and generally kicking back.

The sunshine has broken through today finally, it’s much brighter out and with leaves still on trees and lots on the ground you’d be mistaken for thinking it was Autumn (fall). 

I’ve already found myself a nice new wardrobe of clothes, it’s very refreshing being able to walk into a store and find what I want fairly quickly.  Although that is a sign which tells me I need to get back on the old sushi diet again!

Saying that I went to an Indian buffet for lunch yesterday which was pretty good.  It really made me laugh walking in off the street into what looked from the outside just like any other fairly generic looking store.  Once inside I could smell the spices, the music was playing and when I sat down onto the almost generic ‘curry house’ furnishings I couldn’t help but feel a wry smile breaking out on my face.  I’d found a home away from home inside the home away from home (phew) and the Indians were beginning to take over America.  Ha ha ha!  All new improved Indians.  ‘Well, get off your horse and drink ya mango lassi!”.

My dad would have been so amused with the settin, Alex I’m sure would have found it extremely funny also and I just sat there happily munching away on some biriyani with a fairly good sag effort and pondered how bloody awful Indian food was when we found the only curry house in America last time I came to Olathe.  I think it’s going to be very popular over here very soon indeed!

Around 6pm yesterday evening a wonderful thing happened.  I HAD MY FIRST STEAK!!  WOOHOO!!  Amy, her sister Ashley and I went to Ruby Tuesdays, which for people back home is ‘slightly’ similar to Frankie and Benny’s, but bigger and better, obviously 🙂  Oh boy the steak was so good, eating something wholesome like that makes me feel centered in ways I can only imagine tibetan monks can atain after decades of meditation, and throwing eggs at Chinese soldiers. 

I also got very humbled by a very friendly young kid who asked me where my accent was from when he brought me my steak.  I used to get extremely embarassed when I was younger and never knew how to handle such things because I tended to be terminally shy (yes, really!) but last night it truly made me smile. 

I accepted the gesture as a wonderful compliment and was only too happy to talk to him.  He said he wanted to travel over to my neck of the woods and I only hope when he does he receives the same courtesy that I get here.  Doubtful but one can be hopeful.  It’s a textbook example of the friendly spirit I think you only really get out here in the Midwest of America, people are genuine, eternally curious and assertive with it. 

Oh, and the icing on the cake is that Amy’s moms (Genae) guitar is still in decent working order.  It looses tuning slightly but for the most part it’s like being reunited with an old friend.  Me and the guitar go way back let me tell ya, yessireee!  So I’ll be plink plink plinking away and trying to write something to commemorate my time back here.

So that’s it pretty much, half a week in and papa already has a brand new bag, wardrobe, full stomach and great company to spend the next week and a half with.  What more could a guy want?  I already know that I am going to regret leaving.  I always do.  Still, them’s the breaks?!!

Right, better go.  Have a fab bank holiday weekend back home guys and remember, STICK IT TO THE MAN!

Have you packed yet?!

I’m feeling very cool about going away tomorrow, I’ve had several texts this morning wishing me a safe trip, and an e mail from old baldie bonce which I was rather chuffed at.  I salute you Alexander old chap, tally ho and pip pip!. 

Anyway, “have you packed yet” has got to be one of those quintissentially English things people always ask when they know you are going on holiday; don’t you agree?!  It always makes me laugh because everyone does it, it’s one of the few classless traditions I can think of. 

So, just in case anyone is wondering my honest answer is no, I haven’t.  In fact, I’m going to thank the next  person who asks me for their concern and offer them a personal invitation to come and help me throw in my boxers!  “No, no, the black ones with hearts on them!”.

I normally pack the night before, this time around I’m even less concerned with my lack of packing because my plan is to pack up all my old clothes, suits and things, dump those in a case and when I get Stateside  and then on arrival, give them to charity.  It gets rid of my unwanted clothes in an ethical way AND the weight of my outward bound luggage matches that of my return flight; my cases will be stacked to the hilt with garments and things. 

Huzzah!  Who’s the daddy!?

p.s. Please don’t be shy to leave comments viewers!

Travelling

Howdy!

Thought I’d pop on a new category in anticipation for when I go on hols to America in March (It’ll be my first time back in the States since August 1999…..and I can’t wait!). 

Alex and I enjoy travelling a great deal (inside the UK as well as outside of good old blighty) and we both wanted to post various bits and pieces of previous trips, places we find funky or even blog whilst we’re on the move (inspired by Great Uncle Travelling Mac from The Fraggles)!

Anyroad, I’ll hopefully be posting whilst away at somepoint to let you know how portly I’m getting on the steak. 

Yaaaaahooooooooooo!