Tag Archives: Sid

Sid Evicted!

Sid, homeless man opposite my office, was evicted from his studio apartment today!

Poor Sid had popped out for a stroll around Croydon when the lorry turned up and two men tore down his house with an industrial claw!!  

Wankers?

I’m really quite angry at the callous way in which this has been done; the guy is very friendly to talk to and is standing down there now, distraught at not having somewhere to live!!

The yard is still unused, a development site for an office block that never saw the light of day due to the economy crash; I sincerely doubt anything will happen, so why do something so inhumane?  

We will miss you Sid!

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Sid moves above Scotland in FIFA rankings

FIFA confirmed today that Sid the homeless chap has risen above Scotland in the international ranking system.

Sid’s silky skills are said to eclipse even those of the mighty Kenny Miller; Miller is arguably the greatest sweaty sock ever to pull on a blue jersey.  

Manchester City are understood to have submitted a lucrative bid for his services.  

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The return of Sid – Supertramp

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Stop the press!!!!

Sid, the intriguing homeless man who lives opposite my office,  appears to have returned to his patch and rebuilt his shack.

Perhaps he watched ‘Batman Begins’ and was inspired by how Bruce Wayne decided to rebuild Wayne Manor after it burnt to the ground; could Croydon have its own superhero?!?

I had resigned myself to the idea that Sid had fled from Croydon after the fire a few months ago; so I was somewhat surprised and heartened to see him scrambling over the back fence with a shopping trolley???

Wonder if he’ll get a blue rinse and a bingo membership to complete his alter ego cover?

Maud Violet –  Mild mannered bag lady? 

Anyway!   Welcome back,  El Cid!

Sid – Cheerio!!

Looks like Sid has finally moved on from his Croydon penthouse pad.  This time for good.

Ray spoke to the filming types (he is a nosey old bastard?) who returned to film again this week and they confirmed that he has indeed buggered off.

It is a shame that he has gone, his unoccupied shelter remains and reminds me of all the times when I have been transfixed by his intriguing routines and survival instincts.

It remains to be seen if an eagle-eyed opportunist will spot and claim George Street’s hottest property.

Take care Sid, you have been Croydon’s Robinson Crusoe living rough outside my office since April 2011 and I salute you for enduring.

Cheerio!

Sid – Enduring

The filming crew has gone and I am happy to report that Sid is back in his shack.

All in all, no harm done and the film types cleared up all the rubbish around Sid’s place; it clearly needs a womans touch or a man with cleaning OCD’s.

Not that I know such a man. Ahem.

Sid turfed out by London 2012 Olympic types?!?!

Sid, the intriguing homeless man who resides in a little shanty shack by my work, appears to have been move on by a load of London 2012 Olympic media ruffians!!!!

The Olympic torch is due to pass through Croydon on Monday the 23rd of July, 2012; Patrick Stewart will be carrying it during the final stage before it goes on to Bromley and it looks like a camera and security crew have set up a temporary base of operations in the vacant lot that Sid considers his front yard!

Two cars turned up initially and a ground crew of three people bagged up all of Sid’s rubbish.  It took him ages to make that much mess!  Have they no heart???

For all intents and purposes, it looks like Sid has been evicted and it remains to be seen whether our mysterious lodger will return to his estate or not.

Either that or they have picked Sid to be a torchbearer?  I suppose that would be a great ‘lefty’ BBC News story wouldn’t it folks?

LOCAL HOMELESS MAN CARRIES OLYMPIC FLAME!

Come back Sid, we’d all miss you if you vanished 😦

Fire At Sid’s Place

I am sad to report that Sid (the local homeless bloke) has had a spot of misfortune today!

I was reliably informed during my lunch break that there was a fire near my office. Bored and curious, I popped over to the window to have a mooch.

The foliage next to Sid’s gaff was alight! By Jove!!!

I briefly pondered whether or not there was going to be a divine exodus out of Croydon due to the burning bush, alas, it was not a sign from God but was probably caused by an exploding pigeon. Have at you Satan!!!

The source of the fire will undoubtedly be a mystery until the end of time. The usual right-wing types appeared to be quite pleased that a homeless immigrants shelter was ablaze.

I couldn’t help but feel sympathy for Sid whilst the firemen (no women were present so I don’t have to say Fire person) broke the hosepipe ban and drenched the West Wing of his shack, presumably along with his belongings.

Sid is off the scene at the moment and is most likely unaware of the disaster. My thoughts and prayers go out to him.

No doubt the left-wing types will have poncy wristbands made to wear at a ‘Save Sid from Kony’ fun run! Time and venue to be confirmed next week.

It is something of an irony that a fire broke out in between the offices of two major insurance companies?!?

Right, must go and put my magnifying glass on Ebay!

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Introducing ‘Sid’- The Innovative Homeless Man Who Lives In A Shelter Opposite My Office

I felt it was appropriate to give ‘The Innovative Homeless Man Who Lives In A Shelter Opposite My Office’ a name; I’d like to go on record and confirm that I mean no disrespect, it’s just easier if I’m going to write a regular thread on this chap and his daily life.  If I see him out and about, I’ll ask him what his real name is!

Several people in my office are equally fascinated with our human goldfish; so I suggested that we put names in a hat and choose the name randomly by drawing one out.  That particular idea was met with the usual token left-wing resistance by over-sensitive types who conveyed their opinion that what I was doing was distasteful.  Yawn.

Some of the verbal suggestions that were aired by the Daily Mail readers were certainly inappropriate; the familiar chorus of ‘Suicide Bomber’ ensued before I walked off and asked Ray for him to provide the name.  Good old Ray, always reliable.

Therefore, I am delighted to announce that ‘The Innovative Homeless Man Who Lives In A Shelter Opposite My Office’ will henceforth be known as Sid.  I asked Ray why he chose this particular name, Ray simply replied “Dunno, like Sid Snot from Kenny Everett, sounds good don’t it?”.  So that’s good enough for me.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you; Sid – narrated by Ray.