Category Archives: Editorials

Bah humbuggery

Christmas time.

A time that reflects “Peace and goodwill to all men”; unless you are a Homosexual in a loving relationship and want to be married in a church by the Archbishop of Westminster, Vincent Nichols.

Silly me, I thought God created all men equally?  It absolutely astounds me that people like him still exist……let alone be allowed to air his outdated views via the BBC news?

I remember being utterly shocked, the first time I heard a Christian tell me they thought that homosexuality was “learned behaviour” or even “a sin perpetuated by Satan himself”.

The science of genetics is clearly lost on the masses….?

Gotta hand it to Vincent Nichols though? He certainly picked the perfect time to express his medieval opinion!?

Twat. 

The Catholic church should shift their attention to the widespread abuse of children at the hands of Catholic priests, before it gets involved in current affairs!!!

End of the World – Fail

There is something deeply fascinating about ‘End of the World’ predictions?

My fascination is not so much about the vulnerable crackpots who congregate together in preparation for said event, nor is it a morbid curiosity for the poor souls who take their own lives before Planet Earth goes tits up (unlike Ray who laughs at the lemmings!).

Personally, I am intrigued by those of faith who mock the Doom embracers?!?  For having an odd belief system!!!

Today I heard two moderate Christians, acquaintances, laughing at people who believed the World was going to end today as per the great Mayan calendar prediction of doom….

Hang on a minute, how the fuck can you laugh at anyone for having an “odd belief system” when you believe a fella can walk on water, turn water into wine AND come back from death??? 

They even believe in the Rapture if they are Christian????  The Rapture is obviously far more believable because it is in a book? 

Ironic?  Much?

On a more positive note, the World hasn’t ended and I have a Curlywurly!

Pope on Twitter

I see the Pope is on Twitter; looks like it’s easier to brainwash people electronically these days rather than communicate using fancy pyrotechnics and create a talking burning bush like they did in the old days??

It is amusing though, fashionable atheism is spreading faster than the message of a former Nazi whom has apparently become gods representative in the Catholic Universe.

I have been trying to predict the year when ‘atheism’ becomes the dominant belief system on this planet…..2050???

Here’s my message to the Pontiff.

😛

I know you are reading this fuckface!

Boat

I have never cared for parties; parties are often full of sycophants, people participating in pointless conversation and dancing together in an embarrassing fashion?  Oh dear.

You know the kind of gathering I mean?  Devoid of banter, people desperate to be noticed at every turn and insecurely flirting with every able bodied person in the room?  That’s my personal hell right now…..

Such are the feelings and observations of a very bored 35 year old man; a chap who would much rather be enjoying the company of someone with a functional brain rather than the predictable sheep which I currently find myself surrounded by. 

I have had one or two genuinely worthwhile conversations tonight (you know who you are!) but I am most annoyed that I didn’t listen to my instincts tonight and blow this gig out?

My pussy, my choice…..

Fuck this, it sucks and blows at the same time.

Word.

Snore

Had to listen to the usual Right Wing crap again today; find it really ironic that this fella I know wants to leave the UK because there are too many foreigners here?

What does he expect to find overseas?  Won’t he himself become a foreigner?  Answers on a postcard to:

Righty Rightwing
The Daily Mail
Completely Fuck off
Postman Pat Village
Surrey

Jaffa

I got asked today why I don’t have any children; bit of a personal question innit?

My reply should have been:

  • 1)  They’re noisy little bastards.
  • 2)  They cost a shitload of money and I prefer to be selfish.
  • 3)  They make your hair go grey and your knackers fall off from stress.
  • 4)  My family DNA reached perfection when I was born;, so why have cheap knock offs?

To this question, I simply replied “I dunno?!”

The pain of being a bachelor folks…………………I tell thee!